Episode Transcription

it's important to work on your energy. But then you have to protect the energy when it's up, and that's gonna require boundaries- Totally ... and maybe some uncomfortable conversations. And changing my mindset around, well, it's not me leaving them behind, it's them choosing to stay where they are-

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Welcome back to another episode of the 200% Marriage Podcast with Meredith and Craig. We are talking about the lessons we've learned. We've been doing this podcast for three years.

True- And we decided we would wrap the year with the lessons we've learned over these last three years. We are on lesson number, I think, four, but who's keeping track? I... Uh, nobody. Yeah. And that's a problem. Who knows what we'll have at the end of this, but, uh, this one is a big one, something I did not give a lot of- Any-

importance to ... any importance to before. None. Energy matters. Frequency, the frequency at which you vibrate matters tremendously. Energy you bring into a room, people sense that before they interact with you. Yeah, and it, and it, you leave it. After you leave, your energy, your presence has, has left a, a, a mark on people.

Mm-hmm. Like, it's, it's- Positive or negative ... 100%. And, uh, this one highlighted even more for me this week. That's why this is the one- This week ... that I wanted to talk about this week was we encountered people that were a little bit on the lower energy side. And when you have done a lot of work to increase your energy and the frequency at which you vibrate in the world, it is a dramatic, I don't know, like switch, like, uh, feeling when you come across someone who is at a low frequency who...

and is very negative. And I just wanna be clear that when we talk about energy, we're not talking about, you know- Go, go, go, go, go, go, go ... yeah, how well you slept last night and, like, how much energy you have for the day. We're talking about the energy that you bring to something, like- It's almost like the frequency at which you vibrate.

Yeah. Are you at a low frequency- If- ... criticism, complaining, or- scarcity ... a high frequency, abundance- Gratitude ... gratitude, positivity. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And so, yeah, we ran into that this week. We ended up- Okay ... having to interact with someone for two days in a row that vibrated pretty low. Very low. Always looking on the dark side, always looking on the negative side.

Like, we like to start every conversation with this group with, "What are we celebrating?" And her very first time answering that question was, "That's not the right question for me." I don't know. I'm like, "Uh." "I don't, I don't celebrate, not for me." I don't cele- "Ask me in three hours." I don't celebrate. I- "I'm not a morning person."

Okay. "I'm not having this conversation." Oof. Okay. That's an energy I don't want around. Thank you. It's not how I wanna start the day or- No ... end the day. It was a downer. And not only for... Like, okay, so she's, she's vibrating at that frequency And then now it's like impacted us. It's like, "Oof, okay." It doesn't feel very good.

And then, but then everyone else around is like- Mm ... "Jeez, what's her problem?" Like, "What a bummer. What a downer." Mm-hmm. And, and it, it, it left this... S- so obviously then you, you go your separate ways and, and but then the feeling is still there. Like, so you have to really fight against any negative energy, any negative frequency.

What I've learned over the last three years is that words can lie, people can lie to you, right?

Yeah. Words- For sure ... can not be in alignment, but energy doesn't. Energy doesn't lie. If you're walking into a room with high energy, looking on the positive, feeling gratitude, feeling in abundance, feeling happy and fulfilled and all the things. Yeah. That, first of all, energy goes in the room ahead of you, but also when people interact with that energy, they can feel it.

Yeah. You can't fake that. You can fake things with your word, you can lie to people. Yeah. But- 100% ... your energy can be felt, and you can't fake that. And the more you have that high frequency, that high energy, and you go into those rooms with it, the more you're attracting the people that also have that energy and that, that vibration.

And when you have multiple people, like groups of people that have that energy, that vibration, it's contagious. It also attracts all the good things you're looking for in life. Mm-hmm. Like opportunities and abundance, and when you're building a big life, when you're trying to build your dream, and you surround yourself that are vibrating at that energy, there's, there's way more of a chance that you're going to hit those goals or that you're going to become the person who achieves the dream that you have for yourself when you surround yourself with that energy and those people.

Mm-hmm. And it also works in the opposite direction. 100%. So if you bring that shitty low energy into a room, you're gonna attract those people who are gonna reinforce that view and that behavior right back at you. Right. And the thing is, is that when you surround yourself with that energy, it doesn't just stall your progress, like bring you to neutral, like stop it.

It actively brings it backwards. Mm-hmm. Like, it brings you further away from the things you're trying to get, from that positive energy. So. And so just to close the loop on dealing with, like the energy experience that we had this week, we were like, "God, how are we gonna deal with that?" It dealt with itself.

It dealt with itself. Isn't that amazing? It did. Like, that person opted out of us And it was awesome Very Like, it just, the universe just took care of it. We didn't have to deal with it I, I th- you know, it's, it's one of those things where when a negative force comes into your life and you're a very high energy, high vibration, positive force, it's m- m- something's gonna win out Mm-hmm And really negative people don't like being around necessarily the, the, that positivity I think it shines a light on h- like- How the-

the difference for them Right And they can start to feel it and they don't like that And so then you have a choice. You can say, "Oh, I can do things differently and have different opportunities come my way and, and live in that, or I can stay comfortable and I can just be like, 'Eh, these people aren't for me,' and I can exit stage right."

Mm. That's what they chose to do, w- which I'm okay with. Like, if- Can't live their life for them ... if she wanted to go the other way, I would've, I would've worked with that as well Mm-hmm Uh, sh- she decided not to, which A-okay with me. Mm-hmm.

Uh, an- another interesting thing when you talk about you attract the energy that you have, the energy you bring in to a room, to a relationship, to anything, you attract that back to you. Yeah. It's just another reason to ha- why we say you gotta become the person, the partner that you wanna have in order to get, find that person.

Yeah. So when we coach people who are single and looking for a relationship, let's say- Yeah ... you have to become the partner you wanna have first so that you can attract that person to you. Yeah. One of the first things you ask them is, is who, who is the person that you're looking for? Like, you know- What are the attributes of that person?

Yeah. What, what does that person have? What are their values? Or what does that person do? Like, yeah, like who is that person? And then you ask them, "Okay, cool. That's really cool. Are you that person?" Mm-hmm. And it's a really in, uh, interesting exercise where someone has to then sit with that and be like, "Hmm."

And, and you have to get really, um- Honest ... honest with yourself. A little bit vulnerable- Mm ... and, and, and really take stock of, "Am I that person? Hmm, maybe in some ways. Maybe in others I'm not." And what does that require me to, to do differently- Mm-hmm ... so that I am that person, so that I can attract the person that I'm looking for?

And it applies in business with business dealings and client... Are you attracting the people you wanna be working with? Right. Um, another important point around energy is that you need to protect it. Like, you, you mentioned earlier that we work really hard at bringing our energy up, living in abundance, living in gratitude, feeling the positivity of the universe around us, and reflecting that back out.

Mm. And so protecting that energy- Yeah ... is really important. Yeah. And I say it like it's easy, but especially for- It, it ju- it means that you sometimes don't have an, as much time for some people that wish they had more time with you. Correct. It's m- it, you have to implement some boundaries. Yeah. And boundaries, like we've talked about in this podcast before, is not something that came super naturally to me- Yeah

and something I have struggled with. Yeah. And there are people in my life that I am close to that I have to put up boundaries- Yep ... because- You limit your interaction with them ... especially at different times of day. Like in the morning- Yeah ... when I spend a lot of time bringing my energy up, I cannot interact with that person in the morning because it just brings me down and I, then I start the day down, and I don't want that.

Yep. So yeah, it's important to work on your energy. Living in gratitude is probably the s- simplest, um, approach to bringing your energy up. But then you have to protect the energy when it's up, and that's gonna require boundaries- Totally ... and maybe some uncomfortable conversations. Yeah. It, some people are going to naturally opt out of being a part of your life because they're not going to wanna put forth the same level of effort that you're putting in in increasing your frequency and your energy.

And at first, that is a very we're all, we're good people, and so it feels shitty- Mm-hmm ... when you feel like you're abandoning someone. But you have to take the mindset of, "I'm not abandoning them, they're opting out." Mm. They could do the same work I'm doing. They're choosing not to. They're s- just they're choosing to stay in the negativity, they're choosing to stay in the gossip, they're choosing to stay in the complaints and the scarcity, when they could choose abundance, and positivity, and talking about ideas and, and solutions instead of problems.

But they're so focused on what's going wrong that I don't have time for that. I don't- Mm ... I don't have space for that. I'm, I'm, I'm looking forward, I'm building something incredible, and... Like, they can come along- Mm ... if they wanna do that, too. And so changing my m- my mindset around, well, it's not me leaving them behind, it's them choosing to stay where they are- Yeah

while I grow. Yeah. And that's why, you know, a lot of personal development books and business books and, uh, it's like get yourself around people who have what you have, who are doing the things you wanna do, like the people that you're striving to be more like. And the flip side to that conversation is then you spend less time with the people you've always spent more time with.

And I think that's a very difficult transition for a lot of people on their personal growth journey, on their entrepreneurship journey, when they're working on being a better version of themselves, and often that means spending less time with people they have traditionally spent a lot of time with. And it, to your point, doesn't mean that you suddenly...

Like, I r- I remember struggling with this concept early days, three plus years ago in, in our journey, and like, "I'm just supposed to cut people out?" Like, that was the sort of how I heard it originally. Like, "Oh, I'm just supposed to cut out the people that I've-" Mm-hmm ... "spent all this, you know, 30 f- plus years of my life with."

And that's, that's not it. I'm not cutting anyone out. I'm adding more. Mm. I'm adding more interaction with my life, in my life. So we, we've met people like Dale and Marla, who were here for a visit a couple weeks ago. Like, we make time now in our lives for them. Because- Yeah, such high energy, high frequency.

We talk about ideas, and goals, and dreams, and we build things together. Business. Yeah. And we build things together. And so in order to make time for new things in your life, you have to- Well, you can't, I, I- ... pull that time from somewhere ... I can't spend my time in two different places I can't

like, I, I can't put more hours in my day, so, uh, I need to take hours from somewhere to deliver them over here. And it's not cutting people off and cutting people out. It's inviting more in and spending time in other places, and just creating the boundaries that you need to create to protect the energy that you have.

Yeah, it's prioritizing the time that you have with the things and the people that are going to make you feel good- Mm-hmm ... that are going to advance your life, that are gonna, like, bring you closer to your goals. And it's such a simple concept. Spend more time around people who make you feel good. Yeah.

Like, like when you leave a situation, you- You feel like, "Ugh." Like- Or you feel like, "Ah." That, that such a, that was such a drain. Like, spend less time in there. Mm-hmm. Spend less time in that environment with those people that made you feel that way. When you leave an environment and you're like, "Oh, man, I feel energized.

That was so cool." Like, I, I love- I love that conversation ... I loved hanging out with those people and talking about the things that we talked about, spend more time there. Yeah. That's like, you're, you know. It's not complicated. You know. Mm-hmm. Like, your body knows, you know deep down whether something is, is good for you or not, so just listen to it.

We have to tune into that more. Mm-hmm. Um, but yeah, uh, this one is a big one, uh, very timely this week. I thought that, you know, of all the ones we've listed, I thought let's move this one to the top of the list- Mm-hmm ... to talk about this week, and it just really is over the last number of years something that I've really paid a lot of attention to.

I, I thought it was woo-woo back in the day, like, like energy, frequency, like wha- like whatever. Like- ... like it's woo-woo. Yeah. But it's really not, and I've since, I've noticed a difference over this last, you know, six-plus years but, you know, really in the last three- For sure ... he- heavily. And so how do you work on your energy?

What are the actual things that you do that work, that increases that vibration for you? Gratitude every day. Thinking about before, um, before bed and waking up, I just think about three to five things that I'm grateful for in my life right now. Mm-hmm. Like, just sit with it for a few minutes, feel it, not just like, "Oh, I'm grateful for my wife.

I'm grateful for having a roof over my head." It's like, no. Don't just check the box. Feel it. No, like, like actually sit with it and be like, "What, what is my... How my life is so great right now." Like, I have a wife that I get to wake up next to, and then- And then spend the day with building incredible life together, and we get to spend a lot of time together, and I love spending time with you.

And like, my life is just full when I get to hang out with you, and we get to feed off of each other's energy, and we get to build things together, and that's incredible for me. And so I sit with that, and I feel the feelings of, of getting to do that every day. I'm very blessed that that's something that I get to do every day.

And then, you know, the fact that we've got nephews up the street that I get to hang out with and spend time with and watch grow up and, you know, kick up- Try to influence a little bit. And try to influence them. Like, I've got, you know- Up and battle ... and kick their ass at sports and like, while I can, because I know it's coming that I'm not going to be able to.

Yeah. Your trajectories are going in opposite directions. Very much so. They're catching up. Uh, but I'm enjoying it while I can. Whooping that ass. Um, you know, just being grateful and living in the moment of, you know, what i- what is going well in my life. And that's actually two things, like being grateful and living in the moment.

Yeah. And so- Yeah ... something else that we both do that helps with that a little bit too, I think, is the, um, meditation practice. Yeah. Which also felt s- super woo-woo and silly and- Yeah ... dumb- Yeah ... before we started doing it. For sure. But, like, man, some of your best ideas come right after you come out of m- You're like, "Okay.

So here's how we're gonna..." Like, you come, you h- you come out of a meditation- Yeah ... and you hit the ground running. Yeah. I, I, I do think sitting with your thoughts, like... And meditation is different for everyone. Some people, it's like, don't have thoughts, and it's like, I don't know how that happens. But- Um, but yeah, it's like getting clear, just sitting with your thoughts, not judging them and, and letting them come and go and whatever happens happens, and just listening to your body and your intuition and the things that are going on in your, in your life right now.

And yeah, you get some good ideas there. I've, I've probably had some not so great ones in the past too, but... Uh, walking in nature, walking on the beach, especially for me in bare feet, like that really- Grounding, yeah ... yeah, that- Yeah ... that does a lot for me and for my energy. Yeah. But- So those are just some- Some tips and tricks and things-

some practical things- ... to, to get you in that vibration ... that help us- raise our, our level of energy, raise our frequency, raise our vibration Do a little bit of an audit of the, the stuff that's draining you, though. Um, that, that goes for spending time watching the news. If you're, if you've just basically got Fox News or CNN or some Canadian- Equivalent

CBC whatever equivalent on, I just, I... It's weird that I know American news channels better than Canadian ones. Mm-hmm. It's bizarre to me. CBC News. But, and I don't know if that's, like, I don't know where that falls on the spectrum. Mm. If that's middle C- I have no idea ... CNN, Fox News, I have no idea. Don't, don't watch the news.

D- yeah. But just do an audit of the things that are draining you. Like, if you are spending all that time watching the news and you don't feel good after, why are you watching it? Mm-hmm. Like- Put on a podcast ... the, the, the news that you need to know will find you. The things that you need to know, like if there was an emergency in your area that you needed to evacuate, you would find out about that.

You don't need to watch the news to learn about that. Yeah. So, uh, y- anything that you're eating that's, you know, that- Makes you feel shitty ... makes you feel crappy, stop doing it. Stop eating it. You know, if, if you're sitting around and not exercising more than you know, you would like, i-

Just pay attention to what makes you feel good and what doesn't, and that goes for the people in your life as well. And we're not saying cut them completely out of your life, but y- maybe you limit the time you spend and, and then there's more time spent with people that uplift and energize you. And so with that, hopefully- We bid you adieu

hopefully we're energizing enough that you spend more time with us. See you next week. Bye for now

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