39: The Express Lane to Success

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Episode Transcription

 Welcome back to the Road to Life podcast. McKay and Bennett coming at you. Today, the slow way is the fast way.

What does that mean? Yeah, that's a bit of a mind bender because I think most people are like me and want to get where we want to go.

As fast as we possibly can.

Yeah.

And in fact, I am an efficiency ninja. I want to do things as efficiently as possible to get it all done in the shortest period of time.

Yeah. I'm an efficiency ninja. I think that folks just got a McKayism live. I'm an efficiency ninja. Yeah, you are an efficiency ninja.

You like to think of yourself as someone who's very efficient and gets things done quickly, so you're always looking for the

most efficient way of doing things. You know, if I have to do two or three things, load the dishwasher, start the laundry and write an email, I'm going to start the laundry first.

Then I'm going to load the dishwasher. Then I'm going to write the email because The other, the first two things can work while I'm writing the email as opposed to doing that first and that just delays the other two. So I like to do things as efficiently as possible,

right? And so one of the things we've learned over the last little while is the slow way is the fast way.

Because a lot of times we go into something like building a business or building a relationship and we want to get that outcome that we have a vision for in our minds. That dream of the hundred k months in business or the amazing relationship where there's no disagreements and which is like just a

fairy tale,

fairy tale anyway, but

vacation in the Maldives.

Yeah. The, the, the relationship where you're, you're humming along, you're building your dream life together. There's no, you know, issues that aren't unresolved, all that stuff, like you have that perfect vision of a relationship. And we want to get to that as fast as possible. And so a lot of times we look for the get rich quick scheme or the, the relationship hacks or the health hacks, like just take this pill and you lose a hundred pounds.

You never have to exercise. Those things are Red herrings. They don't move the needle like you think they're going to and by

gimmick.

Yeah, and by pursuing those You're actually delaying Getting to work and doing the things that actually Will get you a result. The tried and true principles, The business fundamentals, the relationship fundamentals, the health fundamentals, diet and exercise.

Those are the types of things that get you the result. On the surface, they look like that's going to take too long. I have to work out and eat healthy for weeks and months and years on end. And then I'll be healthy. I have to focus on my business and practice marketing and sales and reading financial statements and getting good at all that stuff.

I have to build a relationship and build that foundation. Build a community. Yeah. And all that stuff to, to have all those things and they all take time. And so we try to find the shortcut, but the shortcut never works. And so by doing that, you're wasting all that time trying to find the get rich quick scheme that you've delayed getting to work on the fundamentals.

And now when you finally have tried all the get rich quick schemes and all the get healthy quick schemes And you then focus on what's actually going to work

Actually going to move the needle for your business or your relationship.

You've delayed that you've wasted all that time And now you're going to start from the beginning Anyway,

well, I mean It puts me in mind of what we did when we started our business.

I think everyone does it.

Lots of examples leading up to this point, but then we got to the point where we're trying to market our business and we jump right into paid ads, because organic marketing takes too long. we decided let's go the fast way.

Let's go with paid ads at the expense of organic marketing.

Yeah. But you didn't build the relationship with your audience. We don't need a podcast. You don't need it. But that's how you build relationships with folks and how you provide value to the world so that they understand these people actually do care about me.

These people do want to help me have the relationship that I was meant to have. They do want to see me succeed and win and have the life that I want, versus anyone can, you know, show up and, and put 5 or 500 or 5, 000 or whatever on an ad and get their message of it, but there's no there's that that value that that relationship has not been built. It takes a lot more To show up consistently every day and put in that work to show people that this is what who you are.

This is what you want for them. This is how you're walk your talk You're helping them. Yeah. Yeah,

it's similar to the story. You've told before about You In the beginning, you're a beginner. So many of us want to think we're further along than we are so we can take a shorter route. I'm not actually starting at the beginning, you know, for whatever reason you use to justify yourself.

I'm actually starting further down the path because I'm going to start with paid ads So I'm going to start further up the journey. So I only have to do the, this part of the journey to succeed. And as it turns out, no, when you're at the beginning, you are a beginner and it takes you longer to get where you want to go if you don't start from where you are.

Yeah, and there's fundamentals There's things about building a brand and building a business that Yeah, you can you can spend a bunch of money on ads and they may or may not work. Chances are they won't and you're gonna have spent a lot of money that to little to no result Whereas if you focus on building, you know your brand and what you want to do Your message and delivering value speak to your people and yeah Give them some value

and show up consistently day in and day out as yourself in your voice.

right.So it's it's the long way.

It's the quote unquote long way. It's the slow way, but it's the short way like everything in life worth having takes time. There's no getting around that there's just not. Anything worth having the universe is going to ask you to prove that you want it. Show me. I'm going to put obstacles in your way.

There's going to be problems that come up. You're going to have to solve them. You're going to have to figure those out. There's show me that this isn't just a flash in the pan for you, that you are who you say you are, and you are who you are for these people that you're trying to serve. Prove that to me.

And the universe is going to ask that of you all the time. And it's going to take time to go through those hoops. Hoops. Yeah. Just to go through that process, go on that journey. At the end of the day, it is about that journey, right? That journey is what it is all about. So you're actually robbing yourself of that journey by trying to take all those shortcuts.

Right. Cause it's the journey that builds the muscles for you. It builds you into the person you need to be, who is capable of creating that life that you dream for yourself. You know, trying to skip the journey skips the muscle building exercise, skips the process of becoming the human who is capable of delivering value at scale for for people, of having the relationship, of being able to show up as the person in that relationship.

If you don't go through that journey, you're never actually going to get to the result you dreamed. It's just like, Brianna Wiest's book, "you are the mountain". The point of the mountain is not to conquer the mountain. The point of the mountain is who you become by overcoming the mountain.

Yeah. And we've heard time and time again from folks we've spoken with about their relationship, they're looking for the magic bullet that fixes their relationship.

What they don't understand is that there isn't one. It's showing up, it's showing up every day. It's putting in the work every day. It's getting vulnerable and supporting your partner and being a good teammate and challenging respectfully and not keeping score and doing all of those things every day.

And I think a lot of people just don't want to hear that or aren't ready to hear that sometimes in the moment. And then they go and they look for the magic marriage pill or whatever. And they realize that there, there isn't one. You can't just wave a magic wand or swallow the blue pill and you're going to have a magic marriage.

It's just not the way it works. You have to show up consistently and build that relationship. It's fundamental. Show up and treat others how you want to be treated and do that consistently. It's about respect. It's about vulnerability.

It's about communicating, checking in, talking to them, caring about what their day was. It's not complicated. It's very simple, but it takes consistently doing it day after day after day.

Yeah. By not doing that, by trying to circumvent that whole thing, you're delaying the inevitable of having to do it anyway. That's what we mean by the slow way is actually the fast way.

And the fast way is actually quote unquote the slow way.

Because the fast ways you spin your wheels for a while before you realize I gotta start with the slow way.

If you just started with the slow way, all that time you spent spinning your wheels would have you further along.

Right. When you think you're going to find the magic bullet to create that business that creates a million dollars a year for you Understand that there is no magic bullet and it's going to take you showing up every day and creating content and making sure your marketing is dialed in and that your sales message is dialed in that you're adding value and giving back to your community It's all of those things.

And then when you think you're going to find the magic pill to have the marriage of your dreams, realize that there is no magic pill. You're going to have to show up every day and be vulnerable and show up and communicate and be intimate through vulnerability. And you're going to have to challenge respectfully and be respectful.

And Appreciation.

Appreciation and treat others how you want to be treated. There is some sound principles that you're going to have to follow. That's just the way it is. And yes, we want things to happen faster than...

We all do. It's human nature. We want what we want when we want it.

Exactly. Unfortunately, the universe has different plans for you. You have to prove it is what you want and go after it. So when you find yourself looking for that magic pill, remember there isn't one and that if you just get the work on the fundamentals now, that is actually the quickest way to get anywhere you want to go in any area of your life.

That's all for this week.

We'll catch you next time on the Road of Life Podcast.

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