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 Welcome back to another episode of the Road of Life podcast with Meredith and Craig, and today we've got another fantastic episode coming your way. What are we talking about? I'm excited. This episode, actually, this episode was born on a hike that we did. We're talking about community, and this episode came from one super specific instance when we were out on a hike.

We'll talk about it in a few minutes, but. That's where this idea was born, , but community is literally one of the most universal human needs that we all have. Whether we realize it or not, every single one of us is seeking community, our sense of identity, somewhere where we belong. We all want to feel like we belong to something bigger than ourselves.

Mm-hmm. And community helps with that. Yeah, for sure. It's why we. We're the jersey of our favorite sports team. It's why we join book clubs. It's why we're in really niche Facebook groups commenting at all hours of night. Like we wanna be part of something bigger than us. Mm-hmm.

Because at our core, we're all wired for connection. And I think, like, you hear it all the time, it's evolutionary like. Thousands of years ago. Yeah. If we were kicked out of the tribe stepped, we were as good as dead out. You stepped out and didn't do what the tribe or the group wanted you to be doing.

You were a goner. You were, you were ostracized. And William Ma some saber-tooth tiger. Willy mammoth food. Yeah, totally. Do they If they eat people, I have no idea. I'm not a bully mammoth expert. Me neither. Saber-tooth Tigers probably a better one. Let's go with Saber tooth tiger. You'd be saber tooth tiger Food.

Totally straight up. So like , your survival depended on belonging to the group. So it's hardwired in us through evolution in like thousands of years of survival. , it's innate within us and it just, community gives you just so many things. One being like we talked about earlier, as just a sense of identity around, you know.

Who am I? Where do I belong? Mm-hmm. And it, answers those two questions, which are really important questions mm-hmm. That we rely on community to answer for us. Mm-hmm. To help us answer. , and it goes to your, point earlier around, you know, wearing the jersey of your favorite sports team. I know we've been in cities where, you know, say you're in.

Philadelphia and you're a Cowboys fan and you see a bunch of other Cowboys fans. Well, there's a comradery there. Mm-hmm. There's like a, we're in this together. Yeah. We're in this city. It's not the friendliest of atmospheres, but we're in this together.

That happened to me when we lived in, by the way, not Eagles fans. Not Cowboys fans. No. Just to be clear. Definitely not just examples. When we lived in Calgary, montreal Canadian used to play there once a year, and so I used to go to the Montreal game every year. I'd wear my jersey and I would be walking down the street after work with my jersey on and I'd get people honking the horn and waving, and I was wearing the jersey of the opposing team.

But when someone else who was rooting for that team saw me, it created this instant bond. And it was actually the same thing at work when we worked at our company in Calgary. There was like this special club of East Coast people. 'cause there was a good amount, like not a ton, but a few people from the east coast living in the west working at this company.

And when you got into a meeting and you've discovered that you were both from neighboring provinces on the east coast, there was this instant like, oh, you're an East coaster. Oh, you're out here too. Yeah. And it felt like you're a little bit part of a club. And my colleague commented on it one time, she's like.

I'm always so jealous when we go into these meetings and there's another east coaster there. You guys instantly seem to have this like bond. Yeah. I was like, yeah, I never really noticed that before. But there's this like shared experience which creates a community feeling and even though I've never met you before, I know where you were raised and we instantly sort of connect 'cause we're far from home and we know where we come from.

I don't know. It's like this Yeah. This instant bond and connection. Mm-hmm. That's community. It also gives you this such, this sense of support and connection because. It's a place where you can go and feel seen mm-hmm. If it's the right community. Mm-hmm. If you, feel seen and heard and supported and held and loved through whatever it is that you're going through, could be something great.

And they're celebrating. You could be, , a downturn and you're struggling with something and they pick you up and give you a hug. Mm-hmm. And you know, it's, and another. Underrated thing about community, and we experienced this firsthand is, you know, obviously the support and the love and the celebrating when you're, up and a hug when you're down, but also.

The ability to see you through different eyes. Yeah. And to see your greatness before maybe you were able to see it. Yeah. And to give you that, nugget of hope and , seed that you can then take and grow into something bigger so you can start to see your own greatness. Yeah. , you can't see the label from inside the jar.

Like you can't sometimes see the forest for the trees. Like you're, too close to yourself. You can't see you the way someone else can see you. And that was critical for us when we first started on our entrepreneurship journey. I think especially when you go on that journey, , when you completely , change your identity, lose your identity in the process of leaving your corporate job and in your identity, being tied up in that and then you go into that was hard.

You go into entrepreneurship, which is losing your identity hard, obviously, but then learning and going into this completely unknown world to you. Also very, very hard. Mm-hmm. And it's easy to get imposter syndrome and to, , not have the most confidence in yourself in this moment because you're learning so much new and you feel like a beginner and Bambi on, ice and like, you just don't know anything and you can't even walk here.

Yeah. I feel like I'm struggling so bad. But then when other people can see all your greatness, all the things that you do really well that you just take for granted. Mm-hmm. That you show up so differently. Through their eyes than you do through your own. Mm-hmm. And they're able to point that out to you.

Then it gives you just some sort of thing to hold onto. They say, yeah, I am great. Yeah. I am doing things that most people just take for granted is being normal. Mm-hmm. But it's not normal. It's something that I do really well. Yeah. And then you can take that and then build it into something bigger and build your confidence and then you become a snowball rolling downhill.

Yeah. And without community. , you might miss that altogether. , it's almost impossible to get where you want to go without community. There's literally nobody in the world that is self-made that have done it completely alone on an island, isolated from everyone else. Mm-hmm. , it just hasn't happened.

No. Everyone needs community and we think of community usually as this like larger group, like it's a mastermind, it's a fitness class, it's a online community. It's a Facebook group. It's a. Team sport. It's a geographical area. Like we think of community in these like larger macro community senses.

But this is also a community, you and I, this being you and I, you and I are a community. Mm-hmm. Like this is our, inner circle community. And then our circles expand and we've got communities, like large communities too, but community starts with us. Like that sense of belonging. We did an episode on fitting in versus belonging within your relationship, so we'll link to the show notes for that.

But this is, the micro community where it all starts. You can practice in here and then build out to your macro, like larger communities. And I think another super I guess still underrated or not yet as well known benefit of being part of a community, small to large, is , the connection of it.

Like there's a. 85 year and counting Harvard study that says you live longer, healthier, more successful lives when you have connection to other people. Mm-hmm. Like the, literally being a member of a community where you feel like you belong will make you live longer, healthier, happier, more successful life.

Mm-hmm. Like that is insane. Like just take away everything else we talk about in this whole episode. It was the number one predictor of longevity and of living. Not only longer, but like healthy, happier life. Yeah. Is , the quality of your connections and relationships.

Yeah. And so I, teased at the beginning where this episode was born. I want, to jump into that now. I do you remember when we were hiking. Savannah two incline in Colorado Springs and we were just coming down and there was a lady just about to get to the top and she was wearing a University of Michigan hat.

Yeah, she was a machine. Yeah. And , on our way, we just passed her as we're going down and she's coming up near the, summit. And we just said, go blue on the way down. 'cause we recognized her hat. We weren't wearing any Michigan gear, but we're Michigan fans. So we said Go blue. And she caught up to us like five minutes later.

And we ended up chit-chatting with her trying to keep up with her man. She was fast. She's a machine. She was a machine. She does it five times a month or a week, or, I can't remember what it was while, but does it regularly? Yeah. And we're just huffing and puffing up and down this thing. Yeah. So she was like motoring down.

So it was all I could do to keep my feet under me and keep up with her. But we just chit chitchatted about travels, hiking, family, just life with her for like, I dunno, 45 minutes as he went down this mountain and. We never actually got her name, but we had a lovely conversation with her the whole way down.

Mm-hmm. And it was because we had this, , all of us part of this community because we rooted for the same sports team. Mm-hmm. And it's such a good example of like, why was she wearing a Michigan hat advertising that she's a fan of Michigan. Yeah. And then she found two members of her community out in the middle of nowhere in the mountains of Colorado.

Mm-hmm. , it was just so cool to me that we had such a lovely experience with her all because she happened to be advertising her membership in a community that we were also a part of, but we were not advertising. And that's just , an example of what we're talking about here with like, it just makes you feel less alone.

Mm-hmm. Like, you don't have to go through this life by yourself. Mm-hmm. Which is one of the most scary things, I guess, as a human being. Mm-hmm. We talked about earlier, we're volution, we're seeking growth and connection. But being a part of community just reminds us that we're not alone.

Mm-hmm. we're not the only ones going through whatever it is that you're going through. Whatever your struggle is, whether it's in your relationship or in your business, or whatever it is, if you can find that community of people that just can love on you and support you, then it never feels like you're doing it alone.

Mm-hmm. It just always feels like you've got somebody in your corner. Yeah. Somebody who maybe who's gone down that path and knows what to do, or someone who just can see you and allow you to just. Be you talk about what it is that you're going through. Yeah. And be there as a shoulder, pick you up, dust you off, give you a hug.

Whatever it is that you need in the moment, if you have a community, you have someone that can do that for you. Yeah. The other thing about being a member of a community is it allows you to feel some significance. Like significance is one of the six human needs. Significance. Certainty, certainty, variety, growth and connection.

Growth and connection and contribution. So when you can contribute to a community and that's meeting one of your human needs and it helps you feel significant, like what you're, doing has an impact, what you're contributing matters to someone like, we talked about entrepreneurship and how lonely it can feel like sometimes it just feels like you're standing on the cliff screaming out to the abyss and there's nobody out there.

But when you have a community, I. Who of people who are supporting you and who you can support you getting to support them creates this sense of contribution and significance for you to meet some of your internal human needs. Mm-hmm. So we get to contribute to other people's lives and, contribute to something bigger than ourselves and feel like we're part of something.

. Another thing is that when we started on this entrepreneurial journey. No one in our life got us. No one understood what we were doing. They all thought we were crazy. Still do. They still do. They don't get what we're up to. They don't understand that we want to do life differently. We want to build something that one makes an impact in the world.

Mm-hmm. And two, allows us the freedom to live the life that we really, really want, which first and foremost is to make a difference in the world. But then also do the things we love with those we love. Mm-hmm. When we want to do those things. Mm-hmm. And, , we grew up in traditional homes, traditional ways of living, you know, go to school, get good grades, graduate, climb the corporate ladder, all that stuff.

Mm-hmm. , that's normal. And in fact, some of our family members don't understand why we're not doing that now. , they've brought it up to us. Totally. Why don't you get a real job? We have a real job, but they don't understand us. Mm-hmm. And we all want to be understood. We all want to be, , around people that who get us, who get us, who see us, who understand what we're doing, who are on a, not necessarily the same path, but a similar path.

Mm-hmm. Like something that, , they get what we're up to, the struggles that we encounter, the mm-hmm. Challenges that we, go through. It's nice to have those people around so that you just don't feel like you're completely alone and that you do feel like you're understood in this world.

For sure, because also, , you hear about it more and more in the last number of years, like the, loneliness epidemic in this world We're the most lonely as a society than we've ever been. And it's super interesting 'cause we're also technically the most connected we've ever been. You can fly to the other side of the world in like a day.

You can connect with people all over the world instantly. And we know more about each other's lives than we ever have before. It's all on the internet, and yet we're the most lonely we've ever been. Loneliness is like the new smoking. There's a lot of negative health impacts, like mental health, physical health, but like heart disease, dementia, premature death, all come with loneliness.

Mm-hmm. And loneliness comes from not feeling connected and part of a community. So by being part of a community, like we talked about with the Harvard study, you're gonna live longer, healthier, happier, more successful lives and like literally reduce your risk of all these actual physical. Ailments, physical diseases.

Mm-hmm. Like, let's not overlook how lonely we all are and how community is the antidote. Antidote, not anecdote. Anecdote is the story that we just told about our families not believing. Yeah. You know, so not under, yeah. Understanding us. Understanding us. Yeah. Antidote. Mm-hmm. Is the cure for the poison. Yes.

So community being the cure. For the loneliness. Loneliness. You got it. You got it. McKay finally got there. Yeah, buddy. I'm so proud of you. Anti versus antidote. Alright. No, I meant you. Oh, you finally got there? Mm-hmm. , sure. You're still in our last episode. It also, this is, a big one for, us it's, a sense of purpose, but, not only.

It gives you a reason to get up and, to, contribute and that sort of thing. But the other really important part around a purpose is it can help you identify yours. Mm-hmm. If you're struggling. So I don't think we've really give enough credit to the importance community can have in helping you identify what's next for you.

Mm-hmm. If you're not sure. Mm-hmm. If you're not clear on where to go, what the next steps are for you, community. Sort of how they other people can see your greatness before you can. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Because they can see that in you before you can, they can make suggestions or talk to you about certain things that, like, have you ever considered doing this?

Mm-hmm. You'd be really good at this because of, you know, this trait that you have. Mm-hmm. Or this skill, like when Greg invited us to speak on stage in an event for relationships. Yeah. It was like, what? Insane. What, but he saw something in us before we did. Yeah. He saw that we have a superpower and we were too close to it.

Mm-hmm. Thank God. Yeah. And, so it's a really underrated part of community where when you get around the right people, people who wanna see you win, you start to, see yourself through their eyes. You start to see things that they see and that helps you to get, if you're stuck. Get to the next milestone or the next thing that you're mm-hmm.

You're supposed to be doing. Mm-hmm. Which moves you along your trajectory. Like Yeah. You're in your level of growth and development in the next iteration of who you are. , it literally turns decades into days. Mm-hmm. Spend the rest of your life trying to figure out flailing Yeah.

On your own. Trying to figure out what's my next step? What should I do? And you know, there's people out there, maybe you are one of them that. It's, I, don't know what to do. I'm stuck. I've been like this for years. Mm-hmm. I feel like there's more for me, but I don't know what it is. Mm-hmm. Well, the beauty of community is helping you get to that next step, figuring that out.

I feel like you're listening at home. You're like, okay, I'm sold. I get it. Like community. I know I, need community in my life. Where do I find it? How do I get it? I want a community. What do I do? Find your people. First step is find your people and to find your people. You need to know yourself.

What are your interests? What are your passions? What's your purpose? What are your values? Sports teams, hobbies, and if you don't know some of those things, it's cool to just go out and play around and test the waters and like, is this community for me? And go in and explore and talk to people. And maybe you find that it's not for you, and that's okay.

You don't drive. We found lots of communities that weren't for us. Yeah, there's so many. But then when you find the people, the key is when you find your people that you have to dive in mm-hmm. Go all in on that community, show up, show up, participate, show up. Because if you, don't, you only get out of anything what you put into it.

Mm-hmm. So if you don't drive in and, get out of the community what you're looking for, it's not gonna come looking for you. Mm-hmm. , you've gotta engage, you've gotta participate. Yeah. You've gotta give Give more than you expect to receive. Yeah. Always. Yeah. And focus. And like you said, deep dive, go deep.

It's about depth, it's not about width. When you find a community of people who are aligned to your heart, go deep with them. Yeah. And we talk a lot about finding like-minded people, which is fine. It's great. , find people that are, you know, on similar thing, like, like similar things or have similar interest, hobbies, whatever.

But I think what's way more important is like-hearted people. Mm-hmm. , you wanna find people that have a good heart like you have. Mm-hmm. They don't have to think exactly the same way as you maybe you think. More liberal, and this isn't, about politics, but maybe you're more on the liberal side or conservative side and you know, you've got your community, , they're on the opposite end of that spectrum.

That's fine, you can coexist. It's about , what's their heart like. Mm-hmm. Where are they on the heart spectrum? Are they givers and wanna make the world a better place or are they takers and they're just in it for themselves? Because if that's the community, then that's probably not somewhere you want to be.

Mm-hmm. You wanna find a like-hearted community? Love it. Couldn't agree more.

So what's your one takeaway? We love to chitchat with you, but what's your one takeaway, the one thing you're gonna do, because you're gonna hear about it in a minute, but we've got a fantastic community. We'd love to have you join, but maybe ours isn't. Maybe we don't jive for you. I don't know why we wouldn't if you're listening to us.

'cause clearly you like our chicha. So we probably would jive. Just saying, I am just saying the Mastermind's even better. Oh, the Mastermind's so good. The people in it are so good. We're just so much better in person. Can confirm. Plus the other mastermind members are just so awesome and so engaged in diving so deep and supporting and engaging and participating also can confirm.

Mm-hmm. They're fantastic. So it's a fantastic group. It's a fantastic group if we do say so ourselves, but I do, if not our community, that that's okay. Just find a community for you. So what's the one thing you're gonna take into this episode and actually take action on? Because awareness is great. If learning stuff is great, but it doesn't change anything in your life if you don't change something.

So what's the one thing you're gonna change besides obviously sharing stuff episode with somebody you love? 'cause that would be helpful. And the one last thing I'll say is whether it's our community or not, just find a community that resonates for you because you don't want to go through this life alone.

You want to find that community, like all the things we talked about, like hearted, and feel seen and heard and held and celebrated. That's really important to getting to where you want to go in this life. So whether it's our community or another community, we just wanna see you join a community so that you have the people in your, corner cheering you on and picking you up when you need that extra love.

So with love, bye. See you next week.

  📍 📍 Before we wrap up, we just want to remind you about something really special we've created. The Infinite Relationship Mastermind. It's like a VIP backstage pass for anyone looking to level up any and all of their relationships in their life. And we're not just talking about the relationship with your spouse.

Though it does include that one. We're also talking about the relationships with yourself, your friends, your business partners, your family, all the important people in your life. This mastermind is for anyone ready to take all of their relationships to a whole new level. Whether you're thriving and you want to thrive even more, or you're feeling a little stuck and need some extra love and support.

We host exclusive live courses. We create a safe, no judgment space where members can just open up and honestly just have a ton of fun connecting with other amazing people who are, building stronger, relationships. And to be honest, the transformations we've seen are incredible and it's exactly why we do what we do.

It fills our heart like nothing else. Now, we are super protective of this community because it is all about trust, love and support. So it's not for everybody, but if this does sound like it might tickle your fancy, then check out the link in the show notes and reach out to us if you have any questions, we'd love to chat and see if it's a fit for you.

And as always, thank you so much for being a part of our journey on The Road of life. And remember, you've got this, and we're here to help you every step of the way. So we'll see you next week. Bye for now.